Sunday 1 January 2017

2016, That's All.

2016 has been unique.  So unique it has become an adjective: representing the shocking and the unexpected, often leaving us worried; sometimes leaving us fearful. Of course, depending on your general view of things, maybe 2016 has been the best year yet…  But it has found ways to keep us on our toes, I’ll give it that.

This past year has seen obvious political phenomena that has had massive implications resonating across the whole world.  But, more generally, this year has heralded a feeling of chaos and confusion as institutions and ideas that once seemed so safe, self-assured, and untouchable have collapsed before us.  The rise of anti-establishment decisiveness has been awe-inspiring if a little worrying.  Maybe it’s all just overhyped, or maybe it’s just the media playing tricks on us; whatever it is, the past 12 months have certainly left many with a feeling that this year has been a turning point.  There’s nowhere to go now but forward.

For me personally, 2016 couldn’t have come at a worst time.  Leaving university has thrown the structure of my life into disarray: I am now a personified version of the anxiety associated with this past year. 

At university, I was absorbed in genial campus life: a collected identity of learning and belonging, long drunken summers working, and the sanctuary of the library (that’s probably just me).   But this year it ended.  It happened slowly and then all at once.  After a long summer the bubble burst and the autumn rains cleansed me of relaxation (and money) and I realised that this would be tough.  I had expected the expected, but was still somehow left in shock when I realised my undergraduate moments were now memories.  What’s more, is that my future is about as predictable as… well, it’s about as easy to predict as this past year was. 

We definitely need a new phrase for this time of year other than ‘Happy New Year’; I think ‘good luck for the New Year’ has the right undertones.  2017 has begun with fireworks and gunshots – the sequel to a bittersweet year commences and the narrative continues.

But look, this hasn’t been a total disaster from start to finish.  It's been a fantastic year for sport, for one thing; and I'm sure other great things happened this year that I just can't think of off the top of my head - Game of Thrones season 6 was insane, simple pleasures.

For me, I achieved exactly what I wanted at university and felt, at least for a day, unstoppable.  I had a wonderful summer of reading and travelling and relaxing and drinking - generally doing the carefree things I wanted.  

Nonetheless I am pissed off when I think about how naïve 2016 has left me feeling.  So I’m going to make sure 2017 doesn’t catch me out.  I’m not making resolutions or promises, and I’m certainly not investing in hope or optimism; I will simply do my best to welcome in the New Year with an open mind.